Everything is a relationship

I met a girl at a party nursing a sweet sleepy 8 month old baby that openly pulled her boob above her neckline for better reach. She was no longer with the baby's father she told me. "I am sorry" I said. "That must be hard." "Yes but we still live together" she responded. "Also we are starting a bussiness together." "So in what way are you not together? I queried as if this situation seemed strange or foreign to me despite my obvious recent schooling into the world of emotional detachment. Are you just withholding sex from each other for sport? He is a comitment phobe she later described, the kind that goes leaping from windows for fear of being caught inside.  Unable to handle anything that could be mistaken for real these types prefer disposable plastic prototypes. 

Everything is a relationship. There are just different kinds. What kinds do you have? What kinds do you want? I have a relationship with my cat, she sleeps in my bed and trys to steal my pizza crust from the box. 

I text nearly daily with my comitment phobic friend as he maintains his distance in Cambodia. Keeping a country between us for protection from possible infatuation. We swap nuanced indications that we will still be in each others life. "I will have a go at beating your son at chess when I get back." He says dodging real expectation or direct affection. 

This is my relationship with him, him coming and going and dodging more than Mohamed ali in the boxing ring. I pretend not to care. Everything is a relationship. 

I had lunch with a sweet gay man who is becoming my friend. He is dating someone in a serious way but admits they have only ever been in the same place on vacation. He now struggles with what will happen to thier magic if they share a space or even the same Island. They boldly admit to being in love but unreasonably resist any urges to share the same Country for periods that outlast thier holiday. Next stop sking in whistler. They have a holiday relationship.

Everything is a relationship. The exchange of bodily fluids has no magic in marking time. Ok so lets not have sex and call each other mate. Now we have a relationship without sex. This was your idea. Well done.

Over the many years of my fidelity my emotions betrayed me even with good solid airspace between me and a man. I have been more intimately involved with men I have never touched than this one now. 

Even my 21 year old self who didn't want to marry because it would somehow prevent divorce was trying in vain to phychonavigate lifes truths with fowl smelling logic. You can get a divorce without getting married. I now know this to be true. You can't twist logic like a pretzle and make it true. Divorce without marriage, love without sex. Like newton's gravity this falling apple will eventually knock you out cold. 

Everyone is in a relationship.